Saturday, May 14, 2011

Mike vs. The Drive Thru

A little over a week ago, Mike and I were on our way to Atlanta for our flight to Wyoming. We stopped at McDonalds, because as you know, I'm on a life-long journey to obesity.



We pulled up to the order taker machine and a MALE voice comes on and asks us if we want to try their special "turn your veins and arteries into goo" meal deal.

Mike politely declines with a "No sir, I'd like a number 10 with a diet Coke."

Then an angry dragon lady responds, "I'm a MA'AM. You wan' sauce wit da nuggetz?"

Right, how dare we assume that the male voice we were greeted by would be the same delightful McDonald's employee taking our order.

Mike looks over at me. I can hear his internal monologue debating whether to reach through the speaker and go on a McNugget rampage or keep ordering. He chose the latter.


"Barbeque," he said.

"Dat all?"

"No MA'AM. I'd also like a number DON'T COP AN ATTITUDE WITH ME JUST BECAUSE THE ONLY DIPLOMA ON YOUR WALL IS FROM THE HOW TO BE A NASTY WITCH ACADEMY."

We pulled up to the window, got our food, and skidaddled. Down the road I realized she'd given me sweet and sour sauce instead of BBQ, because apparently competency is not one of the requirements during McDonald's hiring process.  >:(

Fast forward a few hours and we've just gotten to Atlanta and checked in to our hotel for the night. (Our flight to Wyoming was early the next morning.) Like usual, I had a late night hankerin' for something sweet. Enter Dairy Queen. There happened to be one less than a mile from the hotel. It was late and Mike wasn't packing cause he left his gun back in SC, so we used the drive thru.

"Can aye take yoo order?"

"Just one second, please."

"What?"

"Just a minute...ok I'd like one scoop of mint chocolate chip and one scoop of Reese's in a chocolate dipped waffle bowl."

"We don't scoop. No scoops. Just soft serve."

Our bad.

"Oh. Ok then a mint chocolate chip and Reeses blizzard."

"Both in the same one?"

"Yes."

"Anyteenk else?"

"Yes, I need a chocolate covered strawberry waffle bowl. That's all."

"Drive around."

We pull up to window and in the 30 seconds it took to get there I decided that if I didn't have ice cream in a waffle bowl that I might perish immiediately. So when the Indian lady opened the window, Mike asked her if she could pour my Blizzard into a waffle bowl. She said no.

"I cannot do that."

"You mean it's physically impossible for you to pour that into that?"

"Yis."

"Well can we buy a waffle bowl and pour it ourselves?"

"Yis."

So that's what we did. And we now officially hate the drive thru.
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7 comments

  1. This is one of the many reasons I love you so much (Mom).  Still testing Mike's tolerance threshold, too, I see.  LOL 

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  2.  Omg. I really can't even deal with these people. Im kind of just speechless, hence the lack of ability to formulate a proper thought and response. 

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  3.  This is seriously hilarious. hahaha 

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  4. KB @ Hello Darlin'Thursday, June 30, 2011

    Bahahaha!!!! Hilarious!!!!!  

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  5. HAHAHA!!! Oh my gosh. People are RIDICULOUS!!! 

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  6.  I went to school near Bear World haha. I love Idaho but the people can be pretty weird!!! 

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  7. That is so freaking funny! 

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