Friday, November 01, 2013

Mean Girls

I see so much bullying on Facebook, and usually from people who try very hard to appear confident and mature.  It is disheartening.  What is the point of being mean to people?  I know sometimes everyone loses their temper or says things they regret, but 10 young adults ganging up on one person via Facebook status is appalling and I hope I teach my children to be better than that.  Actually, I hope Facebook dies before I have children.

I saw this on Facebook last night. One of my friends posted about her new job at Victoria's Secret, and the first comment was from a guy that said, "coming to see you then."  Essentially harmless and easily ignored if you didn't want to talk to the person.  My friend replied, "I really hope you don't," which I initially thought was just a sassy joke.  But then a bunch of people joined in - harassing him for "hitting on her."

I can think of 13513561 guys I know who would have made some similar remark had I posted about Victoria's Secret.  It's just the way men are.  But I guess because it was this particular guy, and he's probably an odd ball, and was maybe a little goofy or "unpopular" in high school, everyone started lashing out.  It made me sad.

Five people felt the need to comment on this status, simply to make one person feel bad about themselves.  What is the point?  If you don't like someone, don't be their friend on Facebook.  If someone says something stupid, why is it acceptable to belittle them or embarrass them, especially if it's not even happening on your profile?
Once I read this, I went to the guy's profile.  Most of his photos are not of himself, but the few that are follow a pattern.  There are rarely any friendly comments.  All of the comments are people insulting him and making fun of him.

I see this kind of thing a lot, and sadly, I usually see it more frequently on the pages of the adults I'm friends with.  Sometimes it's easily excusable as sarcasm or good natured teasing, but sometimes it really gets to me.

I know when I was in high school, I probably wasn't always an angel.  I may have laughed at someone when I should have instead offered a sympathetic shoulder, or maybe I should have been more aware and paid more attention to the people around me who may have been having a hard time.  I do know I was never downright mean, but I went to mostly small schools in military communities, and I just don't remember there being a bullying problem.  Of course, this was also right before Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and other social media sites really took off, so the platform for mean teenagers was significantly smaller.

Because I work in the pageant industry, 99% of my friends are pageant people.  They stand for things - breast cancer awareness, autism awareness, and most often, anti-bullying.  So when I see things like this from people who are such strong "advocates" for anti-bullying, it really grinds my gears.  I don't understand how people can see the news where so many teens have killed themselves or others because of plain and simple bullying at the hands of their peers.  And when I see adults behaving like children, I worry for their sons and daughters.

If I could change one thing about the world, I'd want everyone to be nice.  Now excuse me while I go brush my pet unicorn's tail.
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1 comment

  1. Wow, I cannot believe that people, after highschool, still walk around with that mentality. Its plain bullshit. The people harassing him probably didn't amount to much and are still in that mindset of bashing people to make themselves feel better. I don't know, but perhaps he should quit facebook. Those people won't have the guts to tell him these things face to face.

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